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How to Get into the Driver's Seat of Life (Part 1)
You do not succeed by blaming other people, the economy, the government, your boss, your staff, your family or your enemies.
No matter how hard you blame others, no matter how convincing the argument and no matter how many people agree with you, it still does not boost your productivity, increase your income or help you reach your goals.
You may think it's good for you to blame your problems on others:
"If my boss wasn't so mean, I'd get a promotion."
"Thanks to my stupid wife, we have no money."
"My parents were alcoholics which is why I can't learn anything."
Excuses are just as bad:
"I can't work because the computer is broken."
"My mother-in-law was visiting that week so I couldn't pay my bills."
"If the weather wasn't so hot, I'd finish the report."
Blame and excuses are simply a problem with RESPONSIBILITY.
L. Ron Hubbard has a direct, specific statement about this:
"All real difficulty stems from no responsibility."
This fact can represent a turning point for you if you truly grasp it. All real difficulties includes problems with money, businesses, even bad marriages.
Now this does not mean you must now blame yourself for your difficulties.
Like many people, you might think "responsibility" means "blame."
"Responsibility" is an entirely different concept.
What is Responsibility?
"Full responsibility is not fault; it is recognition of being cause." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Being cause means you put yourself in the driver's seat of the problem. What are you doing (or not doing) that makes this difficulty continue?
You ask yourself, "How am I creating or causing this problem?"
For example, a boss says to himself, "Employees don't know how to do their work. So how have I been the cause of this? Oh yeah, I haven't spent enough time training them. I'll start working on their training this week".
Now the boss has a solution. Instead of blaming employees with the problem he is fixing it.
Another example: "My husband is an idiot. He's not making enough money, so I have to go to work. How have I caused this? Well, maybe if I didn't insist we buy an expensive house we would have enough. I guess I should be willing to go back to work, or agree to a smaller house."
Like magic you calm down and a solution appears.
If you see how you are causing the problem you can then see how you can cause the solution.
How would this apply to something that seems totally out of your control-say someone stole your car? For example, a fellow's new van was stolen despite an alarm system. How did he cause that? After some discussion he realized the real problem was not the loss of the van-he had insurance. The real problem was his response to the theft. Being upset messed up his entire day. He caused the feeling. He caused the difficulty, not the thief. After recognizing he caused the upset, he felt much better and was happy to get back to work.
How To Succeed by Taking More Responsibility
Just using these two concepts about responsibility can make you succeed as never before. The first step is realizing you cause your own problems.
"All real difficulty stems from no responsibility." -- L. Ron Hubbard
What is a difficulty you face? Select one of your problems.
Now try taking full responsibility for it. Not blaming yourself. Not feeling shameful. Not becoming regretful. Simply acknowledging that you cause it.
"Full responsibility is not fault; it is recognition of being cause." -- L. Ron Hubbard
How have you caused this difficulty in your life? What did you do that may have started it? What could you have done differently?
If you find how you cause the problem, you win! You are now in charge of it! You can now end the difficulty.
Recommendations
1. Write down a problem, any problem at all.
2. Discover how you caused it. You have now taken responsibility for the problem.
3. Solve the problem.
Give it a try!
Copyright © 2007 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm or click here. To subscribe, buy books, contact us or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org, click here. |
