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How to Be Happy
Many people believe they cannot be happy. They say, "Anyone who tells you they're happy is lying." "I'd be happy if I had a better _____ (spouse, job, body, house, income, parent, child, boss, employee, government)." "Life stinks and then you die."
The truth is, you are the one who controls the amount of joy you have in your life. You control it based on how well you follow these two rules:
"One: Be able to experience anything.
"Two: Cause only those things which others are able to experience easily." -- L. Ron Hubbard from Scientology: A New Slant on Life.
Rule One
Every time you are unhappy, there is something you cannot experience. You cannot "be there" with it. You cannot face it.
For example, you are unhappy when someone yells at you. If you can experience being yelled at, you can be happy.
So you decide you will learn to take it. You practice by having a friend yell at you until you can experience it. You realize it's simply noise. Because you can experience people yelling at you, it no longer makes you unhappy.
"To be happy, one only must be able to confront, which is to say, experience those things that are." -- L. Ron Hubbard
As another example, you need to give presentations at your job. However, you hate speaking to groups. You make up excuses and avoid this part of your job until you get fired.
If instead, you face the music and give the talks, you succeed. Despite your fear, you face and experience the audience. You confront the job and feel happy.
Wealth Tip
Rule One gives you an opportunity to increase your income. If you can easily experience work that most people can't or won't do, you become more valuable.
For example, understanding complicated laws, performing heart surgery and managing thousands of people are difficult jobs to experience. This is why lawyers, doctors and CEOs make more money than others. Jobs like selling hot dogs or answering telephones are easy to experience and so do not pay as well.
What valuable work can you do that others can't easily experience? What are the most difficult things for you to experience at work? If you could easily experience them, what would happen with your pay?
Rule Two
"Two: Cause only those things which others are able to experience easily." -- L. Ron Hubbard
This means you need to pay attention to others. Everyone experiences things differently.
For example, your colorful language offends your mother, but makes your friend laugh. Spending the day at a shopping mall is a joy for your daughter, but a boring waste of time for your son. Your political views enrage your father-in-law, but inspire your neighbor.
To be happy, you cannot have attitudes like these: "I'll say whatever I want to anyone I want." "If you don't like what I do, that's your problem." "It's dishonest to not say how I feel."
If you don't care about other people's happiness, the people around you will eventually not care about your happiness either. Everyone becomes unhappy.
"To create only those effects which others could easily experience gives us a clean new rule of living." -- L. Ron Hubbard
If you follow this rule, your work relationships, marriage and friendships all thrive. If you break this rule, you lose friends and make enemies.
For example, you notice that your spouse cannot easily experience you complaining about your work. You stop complaining and your spouse is more cheerful. You feel happier. The rule worked.
Employees and Children
You may think this second rule means you can't demand good performance from employees. For example, "My employees can't easily experience hard work, so I'll be soft on them."
However, laziness ruins productivity which ruins your company. A bankrupt company is difficult for everyone to experience!
So you learn to demand good performance in a way that others can easily experience. "Let's get 100 parts built by Friday and I'll buy everyone lunch!" Everyone is productive AND happy.
As another example, children may not like brushing their teeth, but tooth pain is much more difficult to experience. So you get your kids to brush without anger or threats. "Let's all go brush our teeth with this new purple toothpaste!"
How to Be Happy Right Now
What is making you unhappy right now?
Which rule do you need to follow?
"One: Be able to experience anything." "Two: Cause only those things which others are able to experience easily." -- L. Ron Hubbard
What can you do right now to follow that rule?
How to Be Happy Next Week
1. Write down everything that might be hard for you to experience next week.
2. Write what you can do next week to more easily experience these things.
3. List out what you might do or say next week that others may not easily experience.
4. Write how you can accomplish your objectives next week while only causing things that others can easily experience.
Make these changes and you might have your happiest week ever!
Copyright © 2008 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. To read all eight articles on ARC, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/arc.htm. For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm or click here. To subscribe, buy books, contact us or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org, click here. |
