TipsForSuccess: Part 8: ARC For Yourself

 

How to Succeed with ARC (Affinity, Reality and Communication) "The ARC Triangle is the keystone of living associations." -- L. Ron Hubbard Affinity: how well you like or love a person. Reality: how much agreement you have with a person; what you agree to be real. Communication: your exchange of information and ideas. Understanding: The result of combining affinity, reality and communication. The last part of this series describes a vital ingredient to your success. Without it, you will most certainly fail.   Part 8: ARC for Yourself As you have read in the earlier seven articles on ARC, you can use ARC to improve your friendships, marriage, job skills, sales skills, negotiating skills and management skills. You build an incredible level of understanding with people by increasing your reality, your communication and your feelings of affinity. How you treat yourself is the subject of this final article on ARC. Your success in life depends on how you feel about yourself. How high your ARC is for you! "In order to have an understanding of yourself, you must have good ARC with yourself." "It is not evil to like yourself or love yourself." "A healthy state of being is to be a friend to yourself." -- L. Ron Hubbard Do you like yourself? Do you think you're a pretty good person? Are you proud of being you? Do you agree with you? Are you honest and real with yourself? Do you agree with how you do things? Do you communicate with yourself? Do you spend time alone to sort out your condition, goals and so on? If not, your ARC for yourself is low. For example, Dr. Joe secretly knows he is not a good physician. While in medical school he drank excessively, cheated on his tests and barely graduated. As a practicing doctor, he prescribes drugs for himself to further escape reality. He won't face the issue with himself (no communication), disagrees with what he is doing (poor reality) and as a result, hates himself (low affinity). During a minor operation, Dr. Joe almost kills a patient with too much anesthesia. Luckily, his nurse stops him before it's too late. Because he is shocked, Dr. Joe takes a few days to dry up and get his life together. He sits down and really communicates with himself. He writes down everything he is doing wrong. He lists all his lies, all his acts of cheating and how he avoided a real education. He also lists the good things about himself. He comes to grips with reality and decides he can actually make his bad life into a good one. He decides to close his practice, go back to medical school and do things correctly. Even though his ARC for himself has been near the bottom for years, it now starts to go up. As another example, Sarah wants to succeed as an artist, but spends too much time trying to please others. She is terrified of failure and rejection and so only paints what successful painters have painted. When she decides to increase her ARC for herself, she discovers she dislikes herself the most when she "sells out" her true reality. She denies herself when she acts like someone she is not; when she paints in a way she thinks others will admire. So she stops caring what others think and paints a piece from her heart. She pours in her passion, her feelings of beauty and her love. Within a few hours, she paints the most amazing picture she has ever seen. Her ARC for herself soars to a new level. Naturally, everyone who sees her painting is also amazed. They say it is unique; a true original; a thing of beauty. Sarah's career takes off.    Benefits Self confidence starts by having high ARC for yourself. You are less afraid of failure and rejection. You have a level of self-respect that others cannot damage. You have more certainty in yourself as you know and understand who you are, where you are going and what you will achieve. Because you believe in yourself, you make steady progress toward your goals. The problems and barriers you face are easy to overcome because you know you are capable of great success. With ARC for yourself, you face what you do that is right and wrong. You make changes to stop hurting yourself and earn a happier life. Because you have high ARC for yourself, you are your own best friend. You are never lonely.   Recommendations 1. Take some time right now to communicate with yourself. Be honest with yourself. Face the facts about where, what and who you are and who you can become. 2. Sort out what you are doing that you agree with and that you disagree with. Decide to stop doing the things you know are wrong for you. Start to do more of the things you are doing with which you agree. 3. Make a list of the things you like about yourself. Admire yourself for those things of which you are most proud. Be nice to you. 4. Continue to maintain and improve your relationship with yourself. Do more things that build your understanding of yourself. Constantly build your ARC for yourself and the world will follow your example and help you succeed as never before!   Provided by TipsForSuccess.org as a public service to introduce the technology of L. Ron Hubbard to you.     Copyright © 2011 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. Subscribe, buy books or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org at www.tipsforsuccess.org   For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm    Take better control of your life with the TipsForSuccess coaching website at www.tipsforsuccesscoaching.org

 

TipsForSuccess: Part 7: How ARC Makes You a Better Boss

How to Succeed with ARC (Affinity, Reality and Communication) "The ARC Triangle is the keystone of living associations." -- L. Ron Hubbard Affinity: how well you like or love a person. Reality: how much agreement you have with a person; what you agree to be real. Communication: your exchange of information and ideas. Understanding: The result of combining affinity, reality and communication. Part 7: How Raising the ARC Triangle Makes You a Better Boss   Bad bosses cause breaks in ARC when they lie to employees, blame them for their problems or break their promises.   Perhaps the biggest break is when the bosses do not do their jobs. Employees think the boss is supposed to help them, give them advice and lead them in a clear-cut direction. They are right! So when the boss ignores employees and does not help them, the group suffers. Bad bosses are poor communicators. They do not have meetings, explain tasks or answer questions. They do not listen to their group members and do not acknowledge them. Affinity is also low with bad bosses. They do not like their employees and their employees do not like them. They get angry with each other, treat each other with disrespect and do not help each other.   Managing with More ARC   "A common denominator to all good executives is the ability to communicate, to have affinity for their area and their people and to be able to achieve a reality on existing circumstances. All this adds up to understanding. An executive who lacks these qualities or abilities is not likely to be very successful." -- L. Ron Hubbard   As a business leader, owner or manager, your business succeeds or fails based on the ARC Triangle. The most powerful groups in the world have the greatest amount of ARC between the members of the group and the managers of the group. Having high ARC for your employees does not mean you are soft and permissive. You do not hug each other all day. The ARC Triangle is based on the work. For example, when you and all the members of the group agree on a goal, you find it easier to talk. You find it easier to like the members of the group. When there is no goal, the group is not nearly as fun to be part of. As another example, your staff members have more ARC for their work if they are trained. Training establishes hundreds of small agreements of how the job should be done and thus boosts their ARC for the work. If the boss does not train the workers, they feel overwhelmed and cannot produce much work. Well-trained workers know what to do and find pleasure in their jobs because they have a great deal of agreement with you on what they should do. As another example, as a manager, you have a reality that your people can and should do a good job. You communicate that reality when you insist that your people perform to the best of their ability. They agree with this communication and bang! You have a hard-working group, doing what it does best. As a result, you really like this group and this group really likes you. Five Recommendations for Bosses   Note: If you are not yet a boss, you will become one, if you use the recommendations below with your coworkers and boss, whenever possible.   1. Take a few minutes to list the things you like about each of your employees. Go find a few new things for which you can have affinity. You will be more effective with these employees if you admire them. 2. Write down how you can have more reality with your group. What more can you agree on? 3. Communicate these points of reality to your group members as often as needed to obtain agreement. Take care to observe that they receive and understand your communication. 4. Make a list of things you want to tell your group members. Write down when and how you will tell them what you have to say. Plan to be persistent and gentle. 5. Find ways to increase useful communication in and around your work. For example, replace personal chatter with discussions about how to get more work done in less time. Constantly increasing and protecting your ARC with your team not only makes your group more productive and powerful, it makes your job much more enjoyable! (To read all eight parts, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/arc.htm.)     Provided by TipsForSuccess.org as a public service to introduce the technology of L. Ron Hubbard to you.     Copyright © 2011 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. Subscribe, buy books or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org at www.tipsforsuccess.org   For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm    Take better control of your life with the TipsForSuccess coaching website at www.tipsforsuccesscoaching.org

 

 

TipsForSuccess: Part 6: How to Use ARC to Save or Improve Your Marriage

How to Succeed with ARC (Affinity, Reality and Communication) "The ARC Triangle is the keystone of living associations." -- L. Ron Hubbard Affinity: how well you like or love a person Reality: how much agreement you have with a person; what you agree to be real Communication: your exchange of information and ideas Understanding: The result of combining affinity, reality and communication   Part 6: How ARC Can Save or Improve Your Marriage As with all of your relationships, your marriage succeeds or fails based on ARC. The more you communicate, the more you agree on things, and the greater your affinity, the better your marriage. If you do not communicate, do not agree and do not like each other, the marriage is doomed. "Marriages fall apart simply because of a failure of communication, because of a failure of reality and affinity." -- L. Ron Hubbard Young lovers believe, "Our love is so strong, it will make our marriage last forever." Of course, if affinity is all they have, sooner or later, the lack of agreement or poor communication ruins the relationship. Julie and Mario Julie and Mario meet at a coffee shop one night and fall madly in love. When apart, they think of nothing but each other. When together, they can't keep their hands off each other. Neither have experienced so much affinity, so they get married. But their reality point suffers. Julie doesn't agree with Mario's decision to start a plumbing shop. She would rather he became an accountant. Mario doesn't agree with Julie's urge to socialize. He'd rather she stayed at home. To compensate, they decide to not communicate, "Let's not talk about those things right now. All that matters is that we will love each other forever." Of course, by not communicating about their disagreements, their love (affinity) starts to drop. Julie and Mario stop holding hands as often. Sometimes they completely ignore each other at home. They argue about little things, like where to eat dinner, who should clean the house and which type of cat food is best. The little things become bigger things: choices of friends, money, sex and so on. The arguments become fights. Mario storms out and stays away for nights at a time. Julie finally moves back with her parents. The marriage dies.   Bill and Diana Bill and Diana know how to use the ARC Triangle. When they first meet at work, they feel the same incredible feeling of affinity toward each other. Love songs, sunsets and hugs become amazing experiences for both of them. As they begin to plan their life together, Bill and Diana take the time to bring their communication and reality up to the same level as their affinity point. They say things like: "Instead of going to a movie tonight, why don't we talk about our goals." "If we were to stay together, we'd have to agree on how we would spend our time together. I like to spend time with my old friends. What do you think?" "I need to tell you something I did wrong and really regret, but we agreed to not have secrets. Can I tell you now?" While they might experience some glitches in their relationship, the strength of their affinity AND reality AND communication is stronger than the problems they encounter. Bill and Diana get married and stay married for decades. Recommendations You can improve any relationship by improving your ARC. 1. Write down how you can improve your communication with ________. 2. Write down how you can reach more agreements with ________. 3. Write down how you can increase your affinity for ________. 4. Start with the easiest task and do it today. 5. Do the rest of the tasks and continue these steps until your ARC is higher and your relationship is better than ever. If you persist, you will enjoy a major improvement. To read all eight parts, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/arc.htm.      Provided by TipsForSuccess.org as a public service to introduce the technology of L. Ron Hubbard to you.     Copyright © 2011 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. Subscribe, buy books or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org at www.tipsforsuccess.org   For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm    Take better control of your life with the TipsForSuccess coaching website at www.tipsforsuccesscoaching.org

 

FW: TipsForSuccess: Part 5: How to Succeed with ARC (Affinity, Reality and Communication)

How to Succeed with ARC (Affinity, Reality and Communication) "The ARC Triangle is the keystone of living associations." -- L. Ron Hubbard Affinity: how well you like or love a person Reality: how much agreement you have with a person; what you agree to be real Communication: your exchange of information and ideas Understanding: The result of combining affinity, reality and communication Parts 1-4 available at www.tipsforsuccessblog.blogspot.com.  Part 5: ARC Helps You Succeed at Work   Your job is good or bad depending on the level of ARC at your work place. When workers and management have a high level of ARC for each other, the job is a joy. This kind of a group feels like a team. It accomplishes a great deal and expands.   Yet when the people in a group dislike each other, disagree with each other or do not communicate well, you have high stress, low productivity and poor morale.   If you like your job, you have good ARC with at least some of the people there. You talk about the work all day (communication), you more or less agree on work issues (reality), and you feel friendly toward these people (affinity). On the other hand, you might have weak ARC with a few of these people if you rarely talk, disagree on certain things and do not particularly like each other. You might even have an enemy at work. You automatically disagree with the person, refuse to talk to the person and feel hatred toward the person. If your ARC is low with too many people, you will not enjoy working there. Fortunately, you can increase your ARC for a group with these five steps. "If one really communicates and communicates well to these people -- listens to what they have to say and acknowledges what they say and says what he has to say to them, gently enough and often enough that it is actually received by them -- he will regain, to a very marked degree, his ability to associate and coordinate the actions of those people with whom he is immediately surrounded. "Here we have ARC immediately adjusted to work." -- L. Ron Hubbard from The Problems of Work Five Simple Steps   1. Listen to the people at your work   2. Acknowledge what you hear   3. Say what you have to say   4. Be gentle about it 5. Persist For example, if you show up for work and ignore everyone, you will have problems. You will not understand what your coworkers or bosses are doing. You will not be given new responsibilities nor more pay. You will feel alone and unhappy. Yet if you listen, acknowledge, talk, be gentle and persist, your ARC will then begin to rise. You will see people agreeing with you and you will find yourself agreeing with them. You will feel good about what you are doing as you have more affinity for the people and the work. For example, Stan has been a loner since he started his new job last month. During the lunch breaks, he eats alone while the other workers talk about the job and share jokes. After a while, no one notices him. He doesn't like being ignored, but is too shy to break the ice. He hates his job. After learning about ARC, he decides to give it a try. He simply stands near a group, listens to someone talk about their weekend of camping and says, "That sounds like fun." Later that day, he hears someone explain how they do a task and he says, "Interesting. I think I'll try that." Each day, he listens and acknowledges more conversations. He starts saying a few things of his own. Because he raises the C corner of the triangle, the other two points rise as well (covered in Part 1 and Part 2 on this subject). His ARC with the group rises each day. Soon, he feels part of the group and likes his job. When you have ARC at work, you feel more cheerful, think better and make better decisions. You enjoy your work, have pride in your accomplishments and make a difference in the success of the company. You use ARC to rise to the top! Recommendations   1. Listen to twice as many people at work this week.   2. Acknowledge what everyone has to say. Ignore no one.   3. Say what you have to say more often to more people. 4. Be gentle in your communications. Avoid being forceful, demanding or angry. 5. Persist with the above steps until you feel you are a greater part of a team, coordinate more smoothly with others and have more enjoyment. Do not be surprised if you are more successful at work than ever before.     Provided by TipsForSuccess.org as a public service to introduce the technology of L. Ron Hubbard to you.     Copyright © 2011 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. Subscribe, buy books or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org at www.tipsforsuccess.org   For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm    Take better control of your life with the TipsForSuccess coaching website at www.tipsforsuccesscoaching.org