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Who is Stopping You? (Part Two)
A Los Angeles Police Department study determined only 2% of the population was dangerous and harmful to society. Years earlier, L. Ron Hubbard had found almost the same number (2.5%), but he also observed another 17.5% of the population acts like antisocial personalities because they are under the control of antisocials.
So you could say 20% of the people who you know cause 80% of your troubles. One out of five people are not helping you succeed. These are the people who hope you will fail.
Once you discover which people in your life are antisocial, they have less influence over you. You know who to ignore. You know where your stress is coming from.
You also know who your friends are. You know who you can trust. Luckily, most people are on your side and hope you will succeed!
Part One covered the first characteristic of the antisocial personality: they speak in generalities. For example, "Everyone thinks you are too inexperienced," "No one likes what you said" or "America is terrified." Go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/antisocial1.htm to read "Who is Stopping You? (Part One)."
The second and third characteristics are covered below.
Antisocial Characteristic #2
"2. Such a person deals mainly in bad news, critical or hostile remarks . . ."
"It is notable that there is no good news or complimentary remark passed on by such a person." -- L. Ron Hubbard
The social person is the opposite.
"The social personality is eager to relay good news and reluctant to relay bad.
"He may not even bother to pass along criticism when it doesn't matter."
"He is more interested in making another feel liked or wanted than disliked by others and tends to err toward reassurance rather than toward criticism." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Examples:
Antisocial: "Did you hear about the guy who blew his brains out last week?"
Social: "Did you hear about the guy who won the lottery last week?"
Antisocial: "So that was your favorite chicken dish? My mother's chicken tastes much better."
Social: "Great chicken. Thanks!"
Antisocial: "Everyone in the office thinks you work too hard which is why you look so tired."
Social: "Paul wishes he could work as hard as you. I think you set an excellent example for all of us."
Antisocial Characteristic #3
"3. The antisocial personality alters, to worsen, communication when he or she relays a message or news. Good news is stopped and only bad news, often embellished*, is passed along.
"Such a person also pretends to pass on 'bad news' which is in actual fact invented." -- L. Ron Hubbard (*embellish: add fictitious details)
Simply passing on bad news is not enough for antisocials. They prefer to make it seem even worse.
Examples:
Neighborhood gossiper: "Marge's husband left her and now she seems to have a different man's car in front of her house every night!"
Politician: "Unlike my political opponent, I do not support gay marriage. And I will never support child pornography!"
News reporter: "New questions are surfacing about the death of John Smith. Was it really natural causes . . . or murder?"
The social person has a different approach.
"A social personality passes communication without much alteration and if deleting anything, tends to delete injurious matters.
"He does not like to hurt people's feelings." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Examples of social personality statements: "Marge is finally getting out and meeting some men. I couldn't be happier for her." "If I am elected, I will work hard to give our children a better education." "In his will, John Smith left $1 million for cancer research. He was a wonderful man."
Five Recommendations
1. Notice who around you likes to pass on bad news and criticisms. Observe who might be making bad news seem even worse.
2. Let these people know you do not want to hear their negative comments. If they do not stop, reduce your contact with them.
3. Notice who likes to pass on good news and compliments. They probably avoid negative topics and like to talk about positive subjects.
4. Let these people know you appreciate them and want to support them.
5. Work on becoming more social yourself. Do not pass on rumors or criticisms. Never make bad news seem worse than it really is. Whenever possible, pass on good news and compliments.
If you live your life as a social person as much as possible, you and the people around you have a much better chance of succeeding.
Learn more at www.scientologyhandbook.org/SH11_1.HTM
Copyright © 2007 TipsForSuccess.org. All rights reserved. Grateful acknowledgment is made to L. Ron Hubbard Library for permission to reproduce selections from the copyrighted works of L. Ron Hubbard. Take better control of your life with the TipsForSuccess coaching website at www.TipsForSuccessCoaching.org. For permission to copy, print or post this article, go to www.tipsforsuccess.org/reprint_info.htm or click here. To subscribe, buy books, contact us or learn more about TipsForSuccess.org, click here. |
